i’ve always had problems with letting go. it takes a while for me to turn the switch off and move on. when i know something is about to end, i tend to condition my mind, far in advance, a defense mechanism – i say my goodbyes early – that way when the time comes, i am almost ready to step outside the box, unscathed. but really, how does one escape a meteor crashing straight towards you? i don’t know, i lack the wisdom to know such things. and so i do what i do best, i run away.

in a few hours from now i will be like that song – leaving on a jet plane, don’t know when i’ll be back again. funny, there are no words to describe great emotions, i can only quote cheesy lyrics that don’t quite fit. sometimes you have to go away and step back in order to miss something or appreciate something more. i fear change, i fear moving out of my comfort zone, i fear my security blanket is being yanked away from me. and i don’t know how to live with that. if only the world will stop spinning for a while and let me stay in this moment longer…

Stop The World
Matthew West

The TV is talking
The telephone’s ringing
The lights are all on
And the radio’s screaming
A million distractions are stealing my heart from You
I’m tired and empty
This life is relentless
It weakens my knees
And breaks my defenses
It’s wearing me down and I’m desperate to hear from You

Stop the world I wanna get out
I need an escape away from this crowd
Just to hear You speak to me

I need to be still before I make a move
I need to be humble with nothing to prove
I need Your Word to show me the truth
And I need time, precious time

Stop the world I wanna get out
I need an escape away from this crowd
Just to hear You speak to me
Stop the world I’m ready to listen
Show me sign, give me a vision of heaven
I can hold on to
Stop the world I need some time with You

Before I can find my voice
I need to hear Your voice
Above all the senseless noise